Sun : Please note that “Lord of the Dance” is on the order at every service today. This only counts as one tick on the “Hymn Board Bingo” competion, regardless of how many services you attend.
Mon : Was Jesus an Egyptian? Were the Wise Men time travellers? Did St Paul suffer from constipation? Mildred will share these and other ludicrous ideas in her lecture, “Books I bought from the 2nd hand stall on my holiday in Cornwall.”
Tue : Do you have an interest in drains? The Drains Working Party will be working on the drains at Woodby from 10 am. Last time, they were blocked by giant balls of badger fat – what wonders will we discover this time?
Wed : The Healing Meeting at Tremlett Well has been cancelled due to illness.
Thu : Trim Valley Baking Society will be making “Maureen’s Munchies Cakes,” with a special ingredient her husband Arthur grows on the allotment. Please bring a Mars Bar.
Fri : “Tremlett Trotters” meet for a four mile walk through Hangman’s Woods. Jeb will illustrate this walk with the history of “Ropey Kev,” the last hangman in the village, who continued to practice until 1994.
Sat : “Strictly Come Dancing” : Inspired by Revd Richard Coles, we will be holding the Trim Valley’s very own competion! Put on the spray tan! Sprinkle those sequins! Put on appropriate amounts of surgical support! It’s Bossa Nova Night!
NB : weekend leave has been cancelled for the Banburyshire Ambulance Service.
Next Sunday is the last date of the year to nominate for Witch Ducking before Tremlett Pond gets too cold. Please give the nomination forms to Dr Ireland.